you big idiot

i really had to write this.
u broke my heart.
wasn't it hard enough for me not being able to see u more than once a week?
wasn't it hard enough for me to accept all yr excuses and not being able to complaint about it?
aren't u busy enough?
why are u doing this to me?
or am i being selfish?
or was it u?
damn it!
u're the biggest idiot i have ever met
u treat my heart like it was a piece of garbage
u didn't care

all the plans
i prepared myself to see u
i changed my clothes a few times tonight
i don't want to smell bad when i see u
i spent more time than i should in the bathroom tonight
thought i should look cleaner and smell better
spent an hour for a stupid scrubbing session
thought u might be happy when u touch my skin,i'm super soft and clean tonight
but u had to ruin it all
i hate making plans with u
u will ruin everything
because u're big fat idiot

i planned something special
been thinking to surprise u
well fuck it.
no more surprises
no more plans
u'll end up cancelling my plans and making me look stupid
thanks a lot

mental note:i don't care what u might be feeling right now.