the day i'm totally speechless

this is the day that i'm totally speechless
like nothing can come out from my mouth
no argument
no sulking
no rejection
no bullshit whatsoever
i'm speechless

the reasons behind this mute-ness maybe because i didn't think it would hurt me that much.
i didn't know that in order to swallow back your own shame and tears,u can't open your mouth and spill your guts.
u won't be able to held your head high and pretend its ok.
i don't know how to react with him looking so confident presenting his case to me.
i guessed i'm too stunned.
and i'm way too sad.
i can't open my mouth.
because i'm trying to swallow back my tears.

cliche.
i'm being so typical nali.
nali yang kuat nangis
nali yang xpaham benda2
nali yang emo.

i can't fight over this.
i had nothing to lay on the table.
my hands were empty.
i'm speechless as i was typing this.
my heart hurts.
my head spins.
i need to breathe.
i'm strong.
this is nothing.

being stuck in kelantan is a great news.
nothing could have been better than that
can't even compare it to the fact that i get in his way of making money.
well.i lied.
that hurts the most.



mental note:sell the damn car.